Her In Me

Although I agreed with Byron, I was far from being his girl. From that point on, he would park his car in one of my dad’s parking spaces and sit near our back porch, sort of marking his territory. Not attracted to Byron anymore, I wanted nothing to do with him. I mean the way he handled me was far from what I imagined. But no fault of his…he was only doing what he knew to do. I was the gullible one trying to turn Sug Knight into Channing Tatum. Byron soon got the picture that I wasn’t checking for him anymore and went on his merry way. Although horrible, that experience made having sex so much easier. It was as if the ice was broken and I didn’t have to be nervous about it anymore.

Thinking about the number of times I have had sex since then is embarrassing. But what is even more embarrassing is that I can’t tell you why I was having sex. I think it may have been a reflection of the only thing I saw my mother and father do together. As a child, I eavesdropped on their nights together. I would see Ya-Yow preparing for his arrival. She’d put on a half slip that was pulled all the way up to cover her breast and change the linen on the bed anticipating a night of passion. She was excited about the only night she could have him all to herself. Because our rooms were only separated by a window, I could hear and see everything. The next morning, I would go into their room, pretending to be looking for something and there it was…more proof that they were getting it on the night before. There was always a bunched up wash cloth on the night stand. So you all know what that meant.

To date, sex comes so naturally to me, like it’s a part of the package. Now, I’m not going around sleeping with any and everybody. But, I can honestly say that when starting a relationship, I don’t wait very long before I become physically intimate. If he doesn’t initiate it, I will. I don’t know, maybe I am doing what I saw Ya-Yow do. I see so much of her in me at times…..